Vintage guide to the Internet

I made it 2:25 through and had to stop.



  • Chris Hauk

    It makes it a bit easier to take if you just mentally add the words, “for porn,” to almost everything they say.

    • CuJo YYC

      Rather like our pastime of adding “in bed” at the end of every fortune found in a fortune cookie.

  • scamper

    I had to dig around in the embed code for the source URL. Always show the source URL! Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A81IwlDeV6c

    (I have Safari’s FlashtoHTML5 extension on, so it’s possible that the Flash version is showing the YouTube link. I’m not seeing it though.)

  • MrPhotoEd

    I made it to 1:14 and had to stop.

  • Donald Michael Kraig

    The music: Oh, the pain! the pain!

  • Donald Michael Kraig

    Okay. I made it to 3:18. If I watch any more I’m sure my head will explode.

  • GadgetGav

    Oh wow. I almost could get past the ‘Adjust VCR tracking’ and then the music started… Was 1997 really like that? I suppose I didn’t have The Internet in ’97.

    • gjgustav

      To non-geeks. Geeks rolled their eyes at them in ’97 too.

  • Sidewinder

    I almost made it all the way through, now I feel dizzy and bleed from the nose. But honestly, folks, those were the days. I remember, when I set up my first internet connection, blocked the line for 48 hours and was cut short of pocket money for the remainder of the summer to pay for the 300 $ phone bill.

  • Solowalker

    “Installed the internet” “Cybernet” “Chat lines” “Install the disc”

    Haha, oh wow. That’s just too much.

  • johndhynes

    They’re not BACK slashes!

    • http://www.jphotog.com Hrunga Zmuda

      The damage from Windows had already begun. Control, not Command, Start buttons, it never ends!

    • bobrk

      Yeah, I couldn’t go any farther than that. But I beat Dalrymple, which is more important.

  • hauth

    Ok, now I’m at 4:56 – I’m still waiting for THE NANNY to enter the room!

  • Vera Comment

    that family is so square they don’t even fart.

  • ChrisCMU

    Where is the music for that song. I have to install that on someone’s machine when their browser starts up.

  • explodethis

    I watched the whole thing… it was fascinating in a ghastly sort of way. I was starting to wonder if I was watching the result of an overly-elaborate prank.

  • Space Gorilla

    Ah, I remember 1995, my first 14.4 kbit/s modem, building my first website, Yahoo! was still just a list. One of my sites was Yahoo’s Site of the Day, yippeeeee! I built a site that used spacer GIFs so you had to browse the page horizontally instead of vertically, I thought I was a genius!

  • ProductiveMonk

    This is the whitest thing I’ve ever seen. Gawd, I’m bleeding from my ears now.

  • biansta

    no no no no no! EVERYBODY! you need to go ’till 3:36!!! really.

    • biansta

      3:26, sorry.

  • Moeskido

    I got my first ISP account in 1997. I can’t wait to watch this all the way through. I love bad industrials. They remind me why I’m glad I didn’t pursue tv acting as a profession.

  • Dave Brandt

    I only made it to 1:11. Canadians are tough!

  • Matt

    The mom is cute. If she were naked, or maybe in some lingerie, you could turn the sound off and enjoy it. :)

  • CAugustin

    Strange. Comes across like a sales pitch. Lots of talk about how cool it is, but only tiny little facts. 6 minutes in when some facts show up. Is this the way kids have to be treated?

  • http://logicblog.info danski

    Heard this on This Week in Google. “Install the internet”… brilliant!

  • Pacomius

    I wanna get that theme muzak as my ringtone

    Bwaahahahaaaaa! (add thunder sfx)

  • Xander

    nope, made it to the phrase, ‘what does a seaarch engine do?’ and had to stop

  • JT

    Kinda want to bang that mom.

  • ProductiveMonk

    Why are both friends dressed up as TV test patterns? That director should be banned from making anything, anything at all….for life..

  • trex67

    Thank you. That was unwatchable, even for laughs.

  • http://www.ramenramenramen.nrt/ edjusted

    I only skimmed through this, but I’m actually sort’a kind’a thinking about sending this to my internet-challenged parents as an educational video…am I a bad son?

  • Salome121

    I’m waiting for them to sing “It’s Time to Change” because Peter’s voice is changing.

  • Salome121

    And, yeah, they look like Rolling Stones fans. (Note: I did not – could not – watch all the way through. I skipped to the end.)

  • Sam B

    23 minutes in they search for free screensavers, then proceed to download a clearly marked mac-only .hqx file on Windows 95

  • Sam B

    Also, after a few minutes of online stalking, I discover the blond girl is friends with the neighbor boy on Facebook. I’m surfing on the internet!

  • Alan Stubbindeck

    Cripes, was this made on day 2 of the web?